Check this out for a laugh or two, actually, hundreds now! - Page 3 - The Combine Forum
 1093Likes
Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
post #21 of 1487 (permalink) Old 03-02-2013, 12:54 AM
Senior Member
 
greenie303's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Out West
Posts: 277
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
You can just delete this if it is offensive instead of banning me. It is one of my favorite jokes because it came to me in a dream. It really did.

Question: What is the difference between a Mexican and an Okie?

Answer: A Mexican can speak English.

greenie303 is offline  
post #22 of 1487 (permalink) Old 03-02-2013, 09:58 AM
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Manitoba
Posts: 4,769
Mentioned: 2 Post(s)
Quoted: 792 Post(s)


Haystack is offline  
post #23 of 1487 (permalink) Old 03-02-2013, 08:55 PM
Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: SE Sask
Posts: 47
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
At the risk of being socially incorrect............... I know, I don't give a rat's ass.
Elton John and his "partner" David Furnish had their sperm mixed together a surrogate mother was artificially inseminated.

After the baby was born, Elton and David were ushered into the maternity ward. A dozen babies were lying in their cribs, and eleven of them were crying and screaming.

In the corner, one baby was lying quietly, smiling. A nurse came over to both of them and indicated that the happy child was theirs. "Isn't it wonderful?" Elton asked David. "All these crying babies...and yet our baby is so content. This just proves the superiority of gay love!" The nurse said, "Oh sure, he's happy now, but just watch what happens when I pull the pacifier out of his ass...."
SWFarmService likes this.
3creeks is offline  
post #24 of 1487 (permalink) Old 03-02-2013, 10:27 PM
Senior Member
 
greenie303's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Out West
Posts: 277
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
3creeks,

Nothing about that made a real good mental picture. Just where did I put that air sickness bag?
greenie303 is offline  
post #25 of 1487 (permalink) Old 03-02-2013, 10:30 PM
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 390
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Quoted: 18 Post(s)
Ok. Someone has to crash this party. Hardly a clean joke amongst this pile of sewage. I hope this doesn't represent the mind of most farmers. All farmers might not be Christians but most that I've met are morally decent family people.
Prairie Boy is offline  
post #26 of 1487 (permalink) Old 03-02-2013, 10:38 PM
Senior Member
 
8850jd's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: wisconsin
Posts: 3,435
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Quoted: 61 Post(s)
The most recent one i head made me laugh, but its totally politically incorrect..

Did you know most people though Abraham Lincoln was Jewish.
Yep one because he was named Abraham
Second, he was shot in the temple...

Too soon?
8850jd is offline  
post #27 of 1487 (permalink) Old 03-02-2013, 10:42 PM
Senior Member
 
greenie303's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Out West
Posts: 277
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
A grade school teacher was asking students what their fathers did for a living. "Tim, you be first," she said. "What does your father do all day?"
Tim stood up and proudly said, "He's a doctor."
"That's wonderful. How about you, Amy?"
Amy shyly stood up, scuffed her feet and said, "My father is a mailman."
"Thank you, Amy," said the teacher. "What about your father, Jack?"
Jack stood up and announced, "My daddy is a thief, a drug dealer, and a pimp."
The teacher was aghast and promptly changed the subject to geography. Later that day she phoned Jack's house and asked his mother to come to school for a conference. When she arrived, the teacher explained what her son had said and asked if there might be some logical explanation.
Jack's mother said, "Jack's father is actually a cattle buyer... But how can I explain a thing like that to a seven-year-old?"
SWFarmService likes this.
greenie303 is offline  
post #28 of 1487 (permalink) Old 03-02-2013, 11:30 PM
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: minnesota
Posts: 227
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Prairie Boy View Post
Ok. Someone has to crash this party. Hardly a clean joke amongst this pile of sewage. I hope this doesn't represent the mind of most farmers. All farmers might not be Christians but most that I've met are morally decent family people.

They have a place for people like you "Facebook" J/K, kinda, lighten up, go on a different thread.
Badridge is offline  
post #29 of 1487 (permalink) Old 03-03-2013, 12:28 AM
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 78
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Quoted: 2 Post(s)
I have enjoyed this thread and think there needs to be category just for jokes. We can always use a few more chuckles in our lives.
cornchopper is offline  
post #30 of 1487 (permalink) Old 03-03-2013, 03:46 AM
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: NW Victoria
Posts: 11
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
My best mates and I have been going fishing every Australia day for the last 15 years. A couple bring a boat each, another the firewood and another is the cook. I had a phonecall from the cook a few days ago and he said he couldn't come this year as his wife had put the foot down, demanding that he spend some time around the house, tidying the garden, mowing the lawn, going to the tip etc.

I arrived at our usual campsite to find 'the cook' had come along after all. His tent was set up, the campfire was burning, the BBQ cooking and he had 3 lines in the river. Shocked, I asked what had changed. He replied that his wife had just finished 50 Shades of Grey, last night she handed him 2 pairs of handcuffs and said "do what you like".

grunta is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Register Now



In order to be able to post messages on the The Combine Forum forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.

User Name:
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.

Password:


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:
OR

Log-in










Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page



Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
major characters and only two that are actually seen rbstx Tractors 0 10-19-2013 11:36 AM
Good Laugh QT550 Other / Off Topic 0 02-02-2012 08:07 PM

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome