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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I sold grain to a farmer whom I used to rent land from and do custom work for. He has slowly but surly is digging a financial hole he cannot manage. It's been going into the second year since we delivered the last corn to him and he always said he was going try and a bit would come then nothing. It's gotten to the point where they won't answer or return the phone calls and his family even goes as far as to not talk to us in public places. So now it's time for rubber to hit the road. Can someone please share some insight as to how to proceed? I have been in contact with my lawyer over the months just not executed anything yet.
 

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wright it off, and tell him you wrote it off. That way he will talk to you again. tell him someday you hope he can pay it off. You can't squeeze blood out of a turnip, but you can spend a lot on an attorney to get them to try! Live and learn, don't do it again without a check! at least then he would go to jail for writing a bad check! If you force it, it will likely just speed up the bankruptcy and you won't get it anyway! good luck!
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
litefoot
Writing off a real good mans years worth of wages (to give you an idea of the amount) is really difficult for my business to choke back. But I do understand and appreciate your advise.
 

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dschill. I am sorry about that whole situation. And that is a lot of money to write off. I really have no good advice. If he is an otherwise decent guy, just try to affirm him. He may simply be very embarrassed and feeling REALLY awful about what he owes you. If he feels that way, it is probably tough to even face someone you owe money to. If you can somehow contact him, and let him know you are not downright angry at him, and you understand how tough luck can happen. But tell him even a little at a time over the next while is suitable to you. It may save your friendship, and make him feel a lot more comfortable.

I ran a business in partnership with a guy a few years back. He was anal about sending bills, and circling the interest charges, and basically trying to shame them into paying. I bought him out, and I was much more understanding, and people appreciated this. I know what financial strain is, I have lived it. He had not, he was set up by daddy, so he never knew financial strain, and it showed in his expectations from the truly financially troubled farmers. Shaming is not going to work. Working with them, though there is no guarantee, MAY help. Heck, a couple guys owe me a bit after 5 years. Not a lot of money, but I know these guys are simply not having luck, so I just let it go. Compassion can be very important with some folks.

I hope there is some way to contact him. It is tough though, when they avoid you. He needs to feel comforted and affirmed that you are not spitting angry, and that he can talk to you, without embarrassment. and let him know you are glad to help him pay you up over time, so long as he TRIES!!!

Good luck.
 

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If he is a good hardworking guy then I say try talk to high and get alittle at a time if possible. If he's the type that doesn't pay bills but has a new truck, quad , and boat all the time I say spend alittle on the lawyer and see what happens. If you push him to bankruptcy sooner so be it less toys for him and you'll feel better.
 

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I think going to talk to him privately will do you both a lot of good, as tough as that meeting will start out to be. At least you know where you both stand on the issue. Tell no-one you've done it. He may think you are upset and feel you are apt to spread the word that you're unhappy. Reassure him that it is a private issue and it will remain so. I agree with 'uthinkyourwet' when he says your friend is probably very embarrassed about the entire situation. The longer you wait the tougher it will be to resolve, IMO.

Just my $0.02

Good luck with it, whatever you do.
 

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I would strongly suggest you just hire a lawyer and stop trying to talk to him. Once someone stops answering the phone it's time to get legal.
Have family in the banking industry and as soon as the farmer stops answering the phone they start collections.
 

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That's always the worst part about dealing with friends, like the saying goes "never lend money to friends, it's a good way to lose both". I know you didn't lend him the money, but it's much the same. The hardest part is admitting that the friendship is over, when people do this to you, it is embarrasing for them, but when they start avoiding you, they are just wishing the problem would go away, along with you. In their mind if you are out of sight, then out of mind so to say. You need to realize the friendship is over and go after the money, it's not like it was just $10 he forgot he borrowed, when he was taking the grain, he knew it was unlikely he would pay you back. Friendship is about trust and he can't be trusted anymore. Man I sound like Dr. Phil.
 

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Suppliers lean is the best hope, it may be hard to get a social security number, but if you did work for him before you should have it on an old 1099.

Been there done that, had to do it with the best man in my wedding, its pretty dishartning, I would have been happy to take 100$ payments but I couldn't get a dollar on the 35000 he owed me
 

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I think it is hard to see perspectives of BOTH sides, unless you have sort of been on both sides. Sometimes bad fortune happens, despite ones best intentions. A few years ago, we never seeded a dang thing, on two separate years. Three other years we seeded 10 to 40% of our acres. That was TOUGH.

I don't know exactly this situation. But I am going to hope that the friend who bought grain, had every intention to pay for it. Sometimes stuff happens on short notice, and makes things so financially hard.

As your friend, he should be more clear about his intent, and get it out there that he is in tough for a bit, but does desire to pay you.

I collected money back when I was in partnership, not by circling the interest charges in BOLD red, and sending out bills twice a month like my partner did. I collected money, by being compassionate and patient.

Maybe this situation is beyond compassionate response? None of us but the OP know the entire situation.

Maybe the friend is a real basket case, and has sleds and boats, and goes to Hawaii every year.

But maybe, just maybe, he is having an honestly hard time right now. Which is where my original statement comes from: Those of us who have been in the rut of financial misfortune, can better relate to it. But those who have been more fortunate or lucky in life, have a very hard time understanding how someone could be in financial trouble.

I always hear that comment: "If you can't make it farming these past ten years, you ain't much of a farmer." Yeah, well what of you had terrible or no crops for more than half that time? What if you had to buy your parents land during this time, while the neighbors inheritted or were given land?

We all are dealt a different hand. Maybe this friend is a nut. But maybe he is honestly breaking apart inside because of the situation.

I still say try to broach the subject with firm grace. Kindness will go further IMO than anger and demands. He will respond much better to compassion than to added anxiety of a lawyer letter or a demand of immediate payment. Heck, he may even do something stupid if he is clinically depressed.

Just my opinion though...
 

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Know where you're coming from been on the receiving end of a few bad deals myself costs were most likely more than a few superb's worth of Grain. It comes down to nice guys finish last. I'm not saying you should take this guy to the cleaners or push him to bankruptcy, but what's yours is yours. You don't pay bills with thank you's and promises. You don't want to be known as the guy who can be taken advantage of easily. With that said you don't want to be the guy known for crippling guys after a couple tough years. Find a diplomatic way to get your money back without giving it all to the lawyers.
 

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offer to take it out in trade. if he is I trouble maybe a little help from true barter would help, let him trade some custom work, I had a friend that got in a bind over someone writing him a bad check caused his check to bounce guess it was a big check messed up a lot of plans for him. he had just bought a new swing away auger for some new bins he had on the way that he had to cancel because of it and was stuck with the auger so I bought it from him minus what he owed me. worked out great helped him out of a jam and I got a new auger .
 

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Also it could be considered as an investment loss, you may be able to write off a lot of it against some income tax that you had to pay, then get him to make the difference at his convenience.
Unless it's different where you are, I have tried that in the past and it can't be claimed as a loss on taxes. Hope the OP can sort this out without lawyers. The damage has been done when he refused to answer his calls or try and work it out as soon as he got into trouble. We have all had financial difficulties. Avoiding the problem makes it worse. I have had a couple times where people haven't paid (thankfully not friends) or were really slow to pay, causing me financial hardships, but the banks etc. don't care if I haven't got paid, they just want their pay.
 

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litefoot
Writing off a real good mans years worth of wages (to give you an idea of the amount) is really difficult for my business to choke back. But I do understand and appreciate your advise.
It sucks, and you're right, it's hard to choke, but really you made it over a year. Be nice to get it back, but then there's reality. I've got a few owing me money from over the years, it ain't right, but what do you do? That lawyer will dig deep in to whatever you might get.
 

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Discussion Starter · #19 ·
If he is a good hardworking guy then I say try talk to high and get alittle at a time if possible. If he's the type that doesn't pay bills but has a new truck, quad , and boat all the time I say spend alittle on the lawyer and see what happens. If you push him to bankruptcy sooner so be it less toys for him and you'll feel better.
Well the guy has nothing really. Him and his wife bust their tales just can't see the forest for the trees..
 

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Discussion Starter · #20 ·
If he is a good hardworking guy then I say try talk to high and get alittle at a time if possible. If he's the type that doesn't pay bills but has a new truck, quad , and boat all the time I say spend alittle on the lawyer and see what happens. If you push him to bankruptcy sooner so be it less toys for him and you'll feel better.
Suppliers lean is the best hope, it may be hard to get a social security number, but if you did work for him before you should have it on an old 1099.

Been there done that, had to do it with the best man in my wedding, its pretty dishartning, I would have been happy to take 100$ payments but I couldn't get a dollar on the 35000 he owed me

Thats dang tough!!!
 
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