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Discussion Starter #1
A post on another thread by Jake676 made a very important point.

https://supportline.ca/ is the website for the Manitoba Farm Support Services. 1-866-367-3276 is their toll free phone number.

Prices and weather are not on our side this year and it does pile up.

Contact them if you need them, that is their job and what they are there for. I used to work with a couple of them in a past career, they are good people.

I don't know about the services available in other provinces/states so if someone has them please post them.
 

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Mental health is the most important health but the least talked about and has the least resources for it. It seems to be considered a bit more this day and age but still light yrs away from what I would call a working system. I have lost people in my community to mental health and they were he nicest people you could meet and have a conversation with. It is hard to imagine that things could get bad enough to take your own life but it happens everyday. We had our MLA (my neighbor growing up) married with kids take his own life yrs ago. Also a friend of just about everyone and local mayor (yrs back) that was involved with everything in the community with wife and kids took his own life a yr or so ago. Another who struggled with alchohal as well with very loving family and lots of friends. I remember so many incidents of suicide yrs back that it scares me now. Thinking about how many in such a small community with 900 people have taken their own life is sad. Mental health afflictions knows no boundaries. You don't have to be poor or wealthy or addicted to be mentally unstable. It is a problem that is getting worse because of the stress to succeed and the news around the world of gloom and doom at our fingertips and our childrens (which is the most disturbing). When I grew up the world news was the thing I knew the least about. I was in bed before the 10 o'clock news came on lol. Nowadays you can treat yourself to watching the worlds problems 24/7 by every device we have at our disposal. Yes the weather is bad and yes the prices suck. And yes the combine might grenade but there is so much more to life so find help if you need it. It's just a hiccup in life that you have no control over. If the bank takes the farm it might not be a bad thing lol. Just think of the stress reduction!!
 

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Having done this type of work for many years I can tell you that there is no way of knowing how things truly are with people just by looking at them. Some will show outward signs, some won't.

Don't be afraid of this subject with others. This is an intimidating subject to broach with people in private but one of the most important subjects you can bring up. All you have to do is look them in the eyes in and say "how are you doing?" You don't have to have all the answers because nobody does. All you need are ears to listen with. If things are really serious and you feel that you are in over your head or think there may be imminent risk there are professionals at the end of a phone for help, you are never alone in this.

The first few suicidal people I dealt with scared the crap out of me; I didn't really know what to say or do, I didn't have all the answers for their issues. Soon I realized that all you have to be is trustworthy and all you have to do is listen. Again, if you have ANY doubts or questions when dealing with someone who is having difficulty phone the crisis lines yourself and ask what to do.
 

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It's a serious topic. Now and then I wonder where poster "uthinkyourwet" went. The last few postings he was talking of being stressed, then gone. Some people tried offering support and others were none to kind.
As for what Dookiller posted, I hope that if guys weren't old enough in the mid 80s that they pay attention to these things. There was a farm girl a couple grades below me that came home from school one day and never had a dad anymore because of those times. And so pay attention when someone like uthinkyourwet post certain things.

The reason I quit my full time job was because of stress. In hindsight I should have used some of the services that working for a multinational company offers but I had my mind set I needed to get out. Probably a good indication of someone who needed to make a phone call. As a result of that much of what I do on the farm is aimed at limiting my exposure to stress. Call it risk adverse if you will. Its easy to note in my posts.
 

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Mental health is serious topic these past years for farmers.

You are not alone.
Last year shut me down for a few days when I realized I had no way to pay off my debts for the year. I could hardly even harvest. I sat rerunning numbers over and over. Talked with a good financial adviser and mentioned selling out and getting out of farming. Even told my land lords, put land up for sale. Sold a few pieces of equipment. Started making a serious plan out. The relief of accepting this fact was a HUGE load off my shoulders. I physically felt much better instantly. Talked about this with one of land lords that just retired. He mentioned the same thing. Retire was not something he wanted to do. It was a relief when he did it. He was good at the business and money side and believe he retired with money. The physical work side was getting to him. He was getting older.

As it turned out I had a fair amount of unexpected income coming in from insurance and things. The equipment sold was stuff I didn't really NEED. I am still farming. It is still not easy. Find people you trust for honest opinions and talk to them. I talked with a number of people I trust from financial advisers, family members, good friends. It wasn't easy, I don't talk about my problems much. It felt better every time I did. Now I am willing to share my experience knowing how much it helped me. I never had self destructive thoughts, I know this happens. The help was amazing, not always what I expected. Gave me options I had not thought of.

Call those help lines. They are there to help.

FYI, hitting that "post quick reply" button was not easy to do. It feel it is important.

Pray often!
 

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It's a serious topic. Now and then I wonder where poster "uthinkyourwet" went. The last few postings he was talking of being stressed, then gone. Some people tried offering support and others were none to kind.
As for what Dookiller posted, I hope that if guys weren't old enough in the mid 80s that they pay attention to these things. There was a farm girl a couple grades below me that came home from school one day and never had a dad anymore because of those times. And so pay attention when someone like uthinkyourwet post certain things.

The reason I quit my full time job was because of stress. In hindsight I should have used some of the services that working for a multinational company offers but I had my mind set I needed to get out. Probably a good indication of someone who needed to make a phone call. As a result of that much of what I do on the farm is aimed at limiting my exposure to stress. Call it risk adverse if you will. Its easy to note in my posts.
I’m sure he’s still around. We lost a **** load of members with the password change issue. This message board mechanisms is a joke not user friendly at all.
 

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I think he posted on here not too long ago, believe it was to do with how dry he was this year and thought he might have to change his name on here.


My mistake, it was another poster, had to go back and check. Sorry.
 

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So how is everyone doing?? Remember that life has a way of closing in on you when you're down. My wife got chronically ill back in the day and never got better. That, combined with farm stress almost did me in. Don't let it isolate you, talk to people.
 

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It's a serious topic. Now and then I wonder where poster "uthinkyourwet" went. The last few postings he was talking of being stressed, then gone. Some people tried offering support and others were none to kind.
As for what Dookiller posted, I hope that if guys weren't old enough in the mid 80s that they pay attention to these things. There was a farm girl a couple grades below me that came home from school one day and never had a dad anymore because of those times. And so pay attention when someone like uthinkyourwet post certain things.

The reason I quit my full time job was because of stress. In hindsight I should have used some of the services that working for a multinational company offers but I had my mind set I needed to get out. Probably a good indication of someone who needed to make a phone call. As a result of that much of what I do on the farm is aimed at limiting my exposure to stress. Call it risk adverse if you will. Its easy to note in my posts.[/QUO


uthinkyourwet has changed his farm somewhat and is doing much better. He posts regularely on another forum under a different name.
 

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"It’s not the weather/crops or prices....it’s the dumb **** running this country and the morons that might vote him in again"

Thanks for calling me a moron, that should help my stress level.
 

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"It’s not the weather/crops or prices....it’s the dumb **** running this country and the morons that might vote him in again"

Thanks for calling me a moron, that should help my stress level.
Hey you like paying more taxes? Psst the carbon tax is going to keep going up.

You like see your hard earned taxes dollars shipped over seas to various country’s when we have a boat load of issues in this county?

You like seeing the energy industry crippled because of piss poor laws and red tape? Got new for ya if the Libs get in there won’t be an oil patch.

**** I could go on and on. Right know if somebody asks me if I’m from Canada I say no. I’m from Alberta. This country has become a joke with the Liberals running it
 

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Started making a serious plan out. The relief of accepting this fact was a HUGE load off my shoulders. I physically felt much better instantly.
Lanwickum has hit the nail on the head here.
I believe this is the single most important thing you can do to relieve stress. Sit down with family and a good advisor and MAKE A SERIOUS PLAN to improve your situation and get yourself out of the hole you are in, then follow it step by step, a bit at a time.
The relief from sharing the burden and having a positive plan to follow will instantly lift the weight off your shoulders!!!

Never wallow in self pity. It is a pointless, self destructive, soul destroying emotion. There are plenty of people worse off than you.
Take charge of yourself and take positive action.
 

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Yes, simply making that first step can reduce stress. Even if it's a phone call.

It's good to know uthinkyourwet is doing ok. I didn't think he went off the deep end, rather it came to mind of an example of a poster who may come on a forum and start expressing some stress. We don't all take the proper first step and often the second step is influenced by the experience of the first step.


Good post Lan. Brings alot of reality to the topic.
 

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What say we keep politics out of this thread and let it have it's own purpose. I know politics causes a lot of stress, this thread is to help people out that are going through a tough time, not cause more stress.


Keeping an open line of communication with the bank will help alleviate a lot of stress. Financial woes cause the most stress in farming. Trying to hide things from the bank or not being open and honest about what is going on or happening in your life will bear down on you. The bank will eventually find out how things are going anyways, so if you give them a heads up, there is a better chance they will be able to accommodate the issues at hand. I know myself, there have been several times where things have gone bad and unforeseen circumstances caused some financial difficulties. The best thing I did was call the bank immediately and told them what was happening. Because I gave them a heads up, they were able to shuffle things around and put off payment dates. That was the most relieving thing I had heard. A lot of times it's similar to when you were a kid and got in trouble at school.You were worried your parents would find out and you would be in big trouble, so you would keep it to yourself, with your mind making up the worst possible scenarios and building up anxiety that would eat at you day and night. But when finally the day would come they would find out or you finally told them, it was like the world was lifted off your shoulders.


Be open with all the people you deal with, banks, input suppliers, any one you owe money to. Most will be surprisingly accommodating. Most of them see this every day. Your mind can make things seem worse than they really are sometimes.
 

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I think anyone feeling stressed reading this post would see they aren't alone. I have had bad yrs in farming, 3 out of 5 right before agristabilty came out to save farmers. If you know anything about AgriStability when it came out, I was not going to get a dime with a track record of 3 out of 5 disasters. I was living in fear of what to do and times were bad. Only I knew, and some of the corporations I was trying to clear my debt with, knew how big of trouble I was in financially. I managed to keep my wife somewhat oblivious for 1 1/2 yrs. Once I just laid it all out on the line of where I was with my farming operation did I feel a burden lifted from my shoulders. I think the biggest relief was just accepting the fact you are in trouble and let people you know close that you are stressed and why. I was surprised that I wasn't alone. Many have had times when things were beyond tight. Just realizing that many others have gone or are going through exactly what you are helps.
 

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Seems like a lot of people worry about money and weather. Easy to say don't worry about those things but much harder to put into practice. So much in farming is simply out of our hands and success or failure is not totally in our control. Having a conversation the other day about all the farmers that went broke in the 80's, many of them likely worked harder than the successful farmers did 20 years later, just bad timing. Same goes for weather cycles.

Something I have found works well is to always have a thankful attitude about life and towards others. I'm a cup half full type of person, but it takes effort to express that to others. For example I don't think anybody ever thanks the parts or service guy at an equipment dealer, they probably only hear complaints. Often doing this will give that person the encouragement to "pay it forward", and the good cycle continues.

Also in the modern age of internet and texting I think we don't talk enough. People on here know I do both those quite well, but sometimes a phone or personal conversation is so much more rewarding. Hard to feel bad after stopping to have a good visit with the neighbor on the side of the road.:smile:
 

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Not to make lite of a serious problem but anytime you are feeling a little stressed out come on down to Texas and try your hand at this.
A little airborne hog eradication to take out your frustrations. Or if you don't like to fly you can drive and shoot a main gun on a Sherman tank.
Lots of different ways to take out those frustrations.
Anyways just trying to lighten the mood here.
 
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